So, I'm applying for jobs, jobs that pay more than $xx.xx/hr. Yeah, I'm contractually bound not to discuss my wage with anyone. To stay where I am, in the home I've made, I have to get a better paying job. To stay where I am and be able to afford a new car, I have to get a better paying job. At the very bare minimum, I need to be making at least $16/hr to be comfortable and know that I can take a week off without it dramatically effecting my ability to pay bills. As it is, if I were to divide shared bills equally and what not.... I would not be able to pay my equal share on my current income. I thank God that my husband is reasonable and considerate and incredibly patient with my lack of financial contribution to our home.
It is incredibly frustrating to have a college degree, to graduate with honors from both high school and college, and to have very little to show for it. My car was sold the year I began learning cursive. I cannot afford a new car. I honestly have no idea what I would do right now if my car broke down again. That reminds me that I need to finish paying off my last car repairs. I hate being in this position financially. The only thing I could do to make any difference in the financial situation is move to a much less expensive home, and honestly, as my DH has so gently reminded me, for us to find space for us, for our belongings, as is, we would only save a few hundred dollars between the two of us. That is enough for a car payment, but honestly, I just want things to go the way I had planned! I know there are so many people in the same position as I am, or worse, and I know people are in worse positions. It's just, gah!, not what I had in mind for a college graduate.
I did get myself into this. I chose teaching, I knew it wasn't the best pay. But, I knew that "real" teachers made a decent wage, a living wage. A lot of teacher's complain about low pay, but really, 6 weeks vacation at the bare minimum, more like 8-10 weeks, and starting at the high $30K a year. I didn't even make $30K this year, but what can I expect out of an economical childcare facility?
Many of you have heard why I am searching for a job. I have been miserable a good portion of the last 10-11 months. I'm sure I have complained to most of you reading. I don't appreciate the unprofessional behavior of certain administrative persons at my work place and I know I'm not the only one. Honestly, there's got to be a smoother way to run things. Other's have visited other locations and had a much calmer experience. Favoritism. Dishonesty. Seemingly erratic behavior. Constant change that does not appear to have reason. Dishonesty and favoritism are high on the list of annoyances. but not being able to give 100% to my job because of policy, because of controlling behavior, because of lack of support, because of how things just have to be done, "RIGHT NOW", I guess I'm just not designed for this fast-paced environment. Even though I seem to be able to function just FINE everywhere else. Which brings me to the focus of this post.
Job applications.
The idea totally shakes me up. I save lists of jobs I'd love to apply for, but I'm anxious about even sending an email of my resume. How many jobs have I applied for in the last 6 years and not been offered? What ever happened to face to face? To people meeting people. All we are is a list of words these days. I've only had a handful of teaching interviews. Most of those were for substitute teaching. I've only ever been called back for a second interview once, and that was for this job I have now. What is wrong with my resume? My cover letters? I honestly have no idea. Stock letter? Original letter? Reformat? Imitate? Who's the dope who gave up her $15.50/hr because she had to teach? *kicks self*
I know it's silly to be afraid to send out resumes. At some point, something has got to come out of it. But the lack of respond is pretty frustrating. I actually had an interview and an invitation for a second interview and then, nothing! I seemed to pushy by emailing? I called and shouldn't have? Or maybe there are just that many more people out there with more experience? This has been the case for the last 6 years. How can I get experience without a chance to get experience?
Anyway, I made a list of ideas of where to apply in OneNote, and that triggered this "why, why, why" cycle for me. I'd LOVE to hear someone else complain about their unsuccessful journey. Misery loves company. :-) Okay, I'm only miserable for the amount of time I put into this blog post, but I do feel better knowing I'm not the only one in the same frustrated position!
I just want to work hard. Do an awesome, efficient job. Get paid $16-19/hr. Get a new car. Make people happy with what I'm doing. Work hard and leave it there. Organize things. Teach, if possible. Have a boss who is honest and considerate. Someone who wants to work as a team to do an awesome job at whatever we're doing. Or at least coworkers who do.
Anyone else out there? Is there any way to do this without going back to school?
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
Christine’s Hearty and Spicy Spaghetti Sauce
Christine’s Hearty and Spicy Spaghetti Sauce:
- #10 can of crushed tomatoes (this was almost 7 lbs)
- two 4 oz cans of sliced mushrooms
- 1/8 c italian seasoning
- 1 1/4 c red wine
- 3-4 tbsp red pepper flakes
- 2 cans of black pearl olives ( I sliced them)
- ¼ c olive oil
- 1 lb sundried tomatoes (in oil, purchased at costco)
- 2 large red onions
- 3 red bell peppers
- 1/4 c garlic (minced)
- 2 sliced and halved roast zucchinis (roasted with thyme, garlic, and pepper)
- 2 lbs of costco's chicken italian sausage
- salt and pepper to taste
1. Slice and sautee onions in olive oil with salt over medium heat until light brown. Add in bell peppers and garlic, cook until soft.
2. In 6 qt pot, add crushed tomatoes, wine, spices, oil, olives, pepper flakes, and mushrooms. Cook over medium heat, covered.
3. Slice zucchini in half, cover with oil and spices, roast in oven until cooked thoroughly.
4. Add sautéed vegetables and roast zucchini to 6 qt pot, reduce heat, simmer.
5. In frying pan, cook chicken sausage (like taco meat, crumbled). Do not drain.
6. Add sausage to 6 qt pot, mix, simmer until tomatoes sweeten to just the right taste, add salt and pepper to taste.
Note: This whole process took about 4.5 hours. We started at 7 p.m. and did steps 1, 2, 4, 5, and 6, then went out for two hours (from 9-11 p.m.). Then we returned and did step 3, and let it cook for another half hour and turned off the heat. We did have to use two pots until the sauce cooked down a bit.
Friday, May 20, 2011
Sciatica?!?!
While at work on Thursday, I felt my sciatica flare up again. I reached, a bent, I yipped. After softball practice that evening (I know, stupid!) it was really awful. Walking with a normal step and pace was literally impossible without that sharp terrible pain in the right buttock. Oh, how I hate you cockeyed hips and lumbar region! Makes me feel like the 9-12 weeks of chiropractic care and traction and $3000 later was wasted! Must remember to stretch. I think next week I'll back off the partial slacking and get back on the bandwagon. Yardwork can wait. Must go to Body by Candy.
And the enchiladas I made -- they were AWESOME! I will be making those again sometime.
And the enchiladas I made -- they were AWESOME! I will be making those again sometime.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Aches, Pains, and ?
Don't really have a whole lot to say other than, I'm back on track with food, exercise is present, but not too intense yet, and my hip flexors are hurting! I think they became more sensitive after batting practice Monday. I haven't started the program my doctor suggested, but I do want to start it at some point in the not too distant future.
Mowed the lawn two days in a row and managed to burn up the motor a bit! My lawn is looking a bit better, and so are the weeds... :-/
Tomorrow I get to play softball in beautiful sunny weather!
Next post to be about job hunting...
Mowed the lawn two days in a row and managed to burn up the motor a bit! My lawn is looking a bit better, and so are the weeds... :-/
Tomorrow I get to play softball in beautiful sunny weather!
Next post to be about job hunting...
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Backtrack Weekend!
Yup. That's about it. No exercise. Horrible portions. A delicious pork sandwich with melted cheese, roast pork, mayo, dill pickles -- modelled after the Cubano sandwich -- but ate twice as much as I should. Why, you ask? Because I wanted to eat as much as someone else did. I remember that it was the same style of meal a week or more ago that triggered this blogs reintroduction. Oh, and today, oooo today, if you knew, and I won't say so you won't feel compelled to judge! But it was bad. Probably enough calories for the day in one meal.
However, I am back on the band wagon tomorrow! Making chicken and black bean enchiladas tonight. Going to store them in the appropriate size containers to utilize appropriate portion sizes. I've never made them before, but the plan is to cook up the chicken, chop in chunks, toss in some black beans and salsa, let simmer. Then, wrap that mixture with some cheese, diced green chiles, and possibly white corn in a white corn tortilla and cover with GREEN (tomatillo?) enchilada sauce. Maybe add some purple rice for some extra antioxidants? Cook in oven for, I dunno, thirty minutes, and top with some cheese. Really wishing I had picked up some avocados! They are high in fight, but they have some awesome nutrients. :-) And good cholesterol -- plant sterol!
Well, farewell and good night!
However, I am back on the band wagon tomorrow! Making chicken and black bean enchiladas tonight. Going to store them in the appropriate size containers to utilize appropriate portion sizes. I've never made them before, but the plan is to cook up the chicken, chop in chunks, toss in some black beans and salsa, let simmer. Then, wrap that mixture with some cheese, diced green chiles, and possibly white corn in a white corn tortilla and cover with GREEN (tomatillo?) enchilada sauce. Maybe add some purple rice for some extra antioxidants? Cook in oven for, I dunno, thirty minutes, and top with some cheese. Really wishing I had picked up some avocados! They are high in fight, but they have some awesome nutrients. :-) And good cholesterol -- plant sterol!
Well, farewell and good night!
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Illiotibial Band Syndrome and Hip Flexor Strain
After visiting the doctor today, I was inspired to find a little more information on the Illiotibial band. I came across this wikipedia page and found the causes interesting. I've pasted them below and will star my 'causes'. :-)
*Gymnastics: I did kartwheels for the kids this week.
*Running: chasing after fly balls for softball.
I've highlighted things in green that apply. However, I have no intention of avoiding things, just adding exercises, good warm up and cool down, and stretching (but not to the point of pain).
*Gymnastics: I did kartwheels for the kids this week.
*Running: chasing after fly balls for softball.
I've highlighted things in green that apply. However, I have no intention of avoiding things, just adding exercises, good warm up and cool down, and stretching (but not to the point of pain).
Sports activities to avoid while symptomatic
- Running
- Stair climbing or mountaineering
- Deadlifts or squats
- Court sports, such as tennis, basketball, or similar
- Martial arts, such as karate (especially where being bare foot emphasizes any symptoms being caused by leg/foot abnormalities)
- Bowling
- Skating
- Wrestling
- Cycling
- Dancing
- Parkour
- Rowing
- Softball
- Gymnastics
[edit] Causes
ITBS can result from one or more of the following training habits, anatomical abnormalities, or muscular imbalances:
Training habits:
- Always Running on a banked surface (such as the shoulder of a road or an indoor track) bends the downhill leg slightly inward and causes extreme stretching of the band against the femur
- Inadequate warm-up or cool-down
- Excessive up-hill and down-hill running
- In cycling, having the feet "toed-in" to an excessive angle
- Running up and down stairs
- Hiking long distances
- Rowing
Abnormalities in leg/feet anatomy:
- High or low arches
- Supination of the foot
- Excessive lower leg rotation due to over-pronation
- The force at the knee when the foot strikes
- Uneven leg length
- Bowlegs or tightness about the iliotibial band.
- Excessive wear on the outside heel edge of a running shoe (compared to the inside) is one common indicator of bowleggedness for runners.
Muscle imbalance:
- Weak hip abductor muscles
- Weak/non-firing multifidus muscle
Doctors Appointment
I went in to the doctor to figure out what my pain has been caused by around the hip area and side and knee. She deduced that I have hip flexor strain and illiotibial band tightness. I'll be doing some home exercises and stretches. In two to three weeks, if pain still persists, she'll suggest physical therapy. In the meantime, ice, muscle cream, or ibuprofen to help with inflammation as needed.
On a good note, I'm down 7 lbs since I last visited her! Which means that I'm down 10 1/2 lbs overall since February! Yay me! Yay working out! Yay for fun exercise! Yay for Redmond Athletic Club and Body by Candy!
Oh, and I had my first pina colada night. Yum! That's like a once a month kind of drink. Few and far between but OH so delicious!
On a good note, I'm down 7 lbs since I last visited her! Which means that I'm down 10 1/2 lbs overall since February! Yay me! Yay working out! Yay for fun exercise! Yay for Redmond Athletic Club and Body by Candy!
Oh, and I had my first pina colada night. Yum! That's like a once a month kind of drink. Few and far between but OH so delicious!
Friday, May 13, 2011
Day 5
Today is day five of my attempts of portion control and healthy living. This week, I managed to work out 3 times, but I think my body is telling me to give it a break. I mentioned in a previous post that I've had a hard time this year with muscle soreness in my hip area and that has definitely been an issue this week. Mind you, batting and running all use hip muscles. I may have to limit myself to two softball practices a week. Ugh hips.
Portion control hasn't been too bad. I thought it would be harder. Now, I am not aiming for ridiculously low calories, I figure I'm running between 1600 and 2000. It's better than what I was doing, which I think was probably more like 3000 calories, I fear. I did not lose any weight last few weeks, possibly gained some (depends on my cycle I guess). I always try to weight myself on the third or fourth day of my cycle so that I'm at my low weight. Amazing how the body holds on the water weight.
Today, though, I really want a mocha and a pastry, but now is not the right time for it. It doesn't help that three days this week, while walking to Safeway to buy lunch, I've walked by the new Starbucks coconut mocha. Looks really, really good. *sigh* Oh well.
How are you all doing?
Portion control hasn't been too bad. I thought it would be harder. Now, I am not aiming for ridiculously low calories, I figure I'm running between 1600 and 2000. It's better than what I was doing, which I think was probably more like 3000 calories, I fear. I did not lose any weight last few weeks, possibly gained some (depends on my cycle I guess). I always try to weight myself on the third or fourth day of my cycle so that I'm at my low weight. Amazing how the body holds on the water weight.
Today, though, I really want a mocha and a pastry, but now is not the right time for it. It doesn't help that three days this week, while walking to Safeway to buy lunch, I've walked by the new Starbucks coconut mocha. Looks really, really good. *sigh* Oh well.
How are you all doing?
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
American Idol....
For something a little different, I'll just review American Idol tonight!
Round 1
James Durbin has amazing vocals, even if some of his song choices aren't ones I wouldn't normally choose to listen to. For example, there are places in that Journey song he was singing that other vocalists would go flat and it was so NICE that he was right on with pitches. Loved it!
I like Haley's softer vocals, when she puts more into it, it sounds like her voice is exhausted. The MJ song is just odd though. Not a huge fan of that song. She's growling like Casey a lot tonight. Randy really reamed her tonight, though!
Scotty, oh Scotty. First thought, use your upper range on occasion! It's so lovely! And he did, yay! Simple, sweet song. He's got the country vote. I like the way he tells a story when he sings. I think Orthodoxy has spoiled me in that way -- informational singing. I hope he next song is up beat.
Lauren... I love her clothes. :-) I've never heard this song, but the first chord of the song and I could feel that it was a big song. Big song for a big voice. Nice vocals. Good job. Um... not a huge fan of the song, *I* didn't connect as much to the song as I'm sure others could. The song was dramatic, the music itself was dramatic, but I didn't feel the lyrics matched the feel of the song. Anyway, to her performance. It was beautiful. I liked the way she used dynamics in the song and changed her tone for the lyrics. It showed some artistry.
Round 2.... (less thorough review)
LOL Haley's a little pissed at Randy!
Haley.... I like her dynamics! Much better song. Much better performance. Hubby was GREATLY amused with her angry eyes at Randy.
Ok, Scotty, I prefer the less crazy eyes. But he had fun. And I like the up beat.
Lauren had great vocals for the "evil" song, but I thought the first half was better than the latter.
And now, back to James. I love how he breaks the song and leaves you wondering what the heck he's doing! I think I was more amused with M's hysterical laughter while he was singing. Setting the song to a more rock version of the song turned out very well.
In general, I am much more impressed with this years contestants than previous years. As a group, they are much better performers. I also appreciate that there seems to be a larger focus on singing as a whole. There are some very excellent singers with great range and ability to control their voice. It's much more pleasant to listen to! Especially since Paul is gone!
Portion Control
This week I am focusing a lot on portion control. My goal was to just focus on lunch and dinner (mostly dinner). Monday and Tuesday, I walked to Safeway and purchased a frozen meal just to get myself started. Today, I had an open-faced tuna sandwich for lunch. Tonight, I'm going to struggle to find a balanced portion for refried black beans and purple rice. I figure 3/4 c or 1 c is a good portion, but the thought of over doing it (since I often do), is a little nerve wracking. What is an appropriate portion size for this kind of food? I can't just do away completely with any one kind of food, I do need to practice balance in my diet. Today, for example, I had one cookie. ONE. Normally, I would have eaten 2 or 3 or 4.... but today was just one. Last night, I had just a small piece of chocolate, about 1 inch by 3/4 inch. Tonight, I think no dessert would be just fine. But, ugh, beans and rice! Atleast they are loaded with lots of antioxidants (purple rice is FANTASTIC, btw).
If anyone wants to try out Body by Candy with me tonight (or any Wednesday night), let me know. I love this class. Candy is great, enthusiastic, funny, and aware of the people in her class. 5:30-6:30. If I get off early enough, I might even try her ab lab (eek!). My phone number is on my facebook page, so just give me a call! I can have one free guest a month.
If anyone wants to try out Body by Candy with me tonight (or any Wednesday night), let me know. I love this class. Candy is great, enthusiastic, funny, and aware of the people in her class. 5:30-6:30. If I get off early enough, I might even try her ab lab (eek!). My phone number is on my facebook page, so just give me a call! I can have one free guest a month.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Diet/Exercise Log
Breakfast: pita breakfast meal from j-i-b
Lunch: Stoffers chicken, veg, and pasta
Dinner: Broccoli, turkey burger, cheddar cheese, slice of rosemary sourdough bread
Exercise: none today yet
Tomorrow? Body by Candy at the RAC!
Lunch: Stoffers chicken, veg, and pasta
Dinner: Broccoli, turkey burger, cheddar cheese, slice of rosemary sourdough bread
Exercise: none today yet
Tomorrow? Body by Candy at the RAC!
Monday, May 9, 2011
Weight Pains
You would be amused if you saw what the staff room looked like on my first day of the no-extra-snacking week. Please, look at the picture below.
I did manage to succeed -- I walked over to Safeway, had a Stoffers Philly Cheesesteak sandwich box meal. It was moderately tasty. I forgot to have the morning snack (the kids LOVE the strawberry yogurt), but it was loaded with things I really don't want to have anyway. I did have some crackers in the afternoon. However, I did not pick up "dinner," but I'm thinking that maybe an open-faced turkey burger with some steamed veggies might be a good idea.
I mentioned that I'd talk about some 'weight pains' today.
Most recently, I injured myself. I think I have an overworked and tight TFL (Tensor Facaie Ligament), and I really noticed when I was stretching after softball practice tonight. When I first joined the RAC, I tweaked something while I was playing racquetball. Since then, it's been tender. I tweaked it some more when I did Zumba and each subsequent visit to that class. I figured that for the time being, I'd lay off the Zumba. The pain I have is in the right hip area, but it definitely feels like a tendon, ligament, or muscle. It's near the hip joint. At night, it is painful to lay on my right side. I have to sleep at an angle if I'm on my right side. It's pretty high up on my thigh and I think I may have not strength some of my other muscles on the right side near the obliques as well. I notice it especially if I'm stretching over to my left or doing the stretch where my right knee is down on the ground, my left leg up in front with a little lean forward. It definitely stretches it, but there was a week where that was incredibly painful.
Prior to this injury, I had been having a sharp, painful twinge with varied movements in my right butt cheek. It was prominent if I did not work out every two to three days. For example, if I did Monday and Wednesday at Curves and then skipped Friday, without fail, Friday evening, reach across my body, twist or bend and -- eep! -- there it was! When it started radiating down my leg, I figured it was time to do something, so I went to a chiropractor. Turns out that my pelvis was crooked because my lumbar region was warped.
I like to call the pain I was having sciatica, since it seems to match the most with the symptoms. I've always known that I had tight hip muscles, tendons, ligaments, but it became abundantly clear when I started chiropractic care. I spent December 2010 through February 2011 visiting the chiropractic 3 days a week. I had adjustments and traction. My was also curved the wrong direction, but I blame computer usage for that, not my weight and lack of muscle tone. The therapy straightened me out pretty well, but after insurance coverage, I still owed $3200, which, thank God, I could use care credit to pay for.... interest free for a set period of time. Since then, I've noticed muscle soreness in my groin, hip, and pelvic area, especially if I sit down for more than ten minutes. Granted, most evenings, I sit in front of the television, knees pulled up in the recliner. But still. I'm don't think I'm using the muscles enough to have consistent soreness. Thankfully, it's not to severe.
My other weight pain may also be a side effect of the chiropractic care. My right knee really doesn't appreciate any length of standing. I find myself leaning on that side, though, especially when I forget to wear my heel lift (which also, subsequently, brings up sciatica issues!). This, of course, isn't helped by being a kindergarten teacher, constantly moving, standing, changing positions all day, or at least isn't eased. Not to mention, being in an Orthodox Church choir. If you don't know what I'm talking about, come join us. (But if you really don't want to, just know that I stand for 1-3 hours at a time on Saturday and Sunday for the church service. Not required, although standing is highly encouraged, but being in the choir and singing in response to things throughout the service, I kind of need to be standing, unless the choir go flat because of my lack of breath support!) I apologize, of course, for the delightfully busy run-on sentence. I enjoy using commas (I'm sure I didn't not use them correctly up there, somewhere). Anyway, I need to be able to stand. And I want to be able to jerk myself around to chase a softball or racquetball or tennis ball. But, alas, my knee does not appreciate any of these activities!
One thing I have started doing, at the persistent encouragement of my friend Leah, is stretching. No more ten second stretches for me! I aim for at least 30 seconds. I also received a series of stretching exercises from the chiropractor that focus specifically on the hip region. It was really helped with the pain and other areas of life. ;-) (My mother would read this a think -- TMI, TMI, TMI!!)
So, note to all: start stretching, don't gain this much weight, and workout regularly, at least three days a week. It does help!
Now, I'm starving and would really like to smell that turkey burger cooking with Penzey's Northwoods spice mix. Delicious!
Apparently, hubby was tired of waiting for me! Food is cooking already!
I did manage to succeed -- I walked over to Safeway, had a Stoffers Philly Cheesesteak sandwich box meal. It was moderately tasty. I forgot to have the morning snack (the kids LOVE the strawberry yogurt), but it was loaded with things I really don't want to have anyway. I did have some crackers in the afternoon. However, I did not pick up "dinner," but I'm thinking that maybe an open-faced turkey burger with some steamed veggies might be a good idea.
I mentioned that I'd talk about some 'weight pains' today.
Most recently, I injured myself. I think I have an overworked and tight TFL (Tensor Facaie Ligament), and I really noticed when I was stretching after softball practice tonight. When I first joined the RAC, I tweaked something while I was playing racquetball. Since then, it's been tender. I tweaked it some more when I did Zumba and each subsequent visit to that class. I figured that for the time being, I'd lay off the Zumba. The pain I have is in the right hip area, but it definitely feels like a tendon, ligament, or muscle. It's near the hip joint. At night, it is painful to lay on my right side. I have to sleep at an angle if I'm on my right side. It's pretty high up on my thigh and I think I may have not strength some of my other muscles on the right side near the obliques as well. I notice it especially if I'm stretching over to my left or doing the stretch where my right knee is down on the ground, my left leg up in front with a little lean forward. It definitely stretches it, but there was a week where that was incredibly painful.
Prior to this injury, I had been having a sharp, painful twinge with varied movements in my right butt cheek. It was prominent if I did not work out every two to three days. For example, if I did Monday and Wednesday at Curves and then skipped Friday, without fail, Friday evening, reach across my body, twist or bend and -- eep! -- there it was! When it started radiating down my leg, I figured it was time to do something, so I went to a chiropractor. Turns out that my pelvis was crooked because my lumbar region was warped.
I like to call the pain I was having sciatica, since it seems to match the most with the symptoms. I've always known that I had tight hip muscles, tendons, ligaments, but it became abundantly clear when I started chiropractic care. I spent December 2010 through February 2011 visiting the chiropractic 3 days a week. I had adjustments and traction. My was also curved the wrong direction, but I blame computer usage for that, not my weight and lack of muscle tone. The therapy straightened me out pretty well, but after insurance coverage, I still owed $3200, which, thank God, I could use care credit to pay for.... interest free for a set period of time. Since then, I've noticed muscle soreness in my groin, hip, and pelvic area, especially if I sit down for more than ten minutes. Granted, most evenings, I sit in front of the television, knees pulled up in the recliner. But still. I'm don't think I'm using the muscles enough to have consistent soreness. Thankfully, it's not to severe.
My other weight pain may also be a side effect of the chiropractic care. My right knee really doesn't appreciate any length of standing. I find myself leaning on that side, though, especially when I forget to wear my heel lift (which also, subsequently, brings up sciatica issues!). This, of course, isn't helped by being a kindergarten teacher, constantly moving, standing, changing positions all day, or at least isn't eased. Not to mention, being in an Orthodox Church choir. If you don't know what I'm talking about, come join us. (But if you really don't want to, just know that I stand for 1-3 hours at a time on Saturday and Sunday for the church service. Not required, although standing is highly encouraged, but being in the choir and singing in response to things throughout the service, I kind of need to be standing, unless the choir go flat because of my lack of breath support!) I apologize, of course, for the delightfully busy run-on sentence. I enjoy using commas (I'm sure I didn't not use them correctly up there, somewhere). Anyway, I need to be able to stand. And I want to be able to jerk myself around to chase a softball or racquetball or tennis ball. But, alas, my knee does not appreciate any of these activities!
One thing I have started doing, at the persistent encouragement of my friend Leah, is stretching. No more ten second stretches for me! I aim for at least 30 seconds. I also received a series of stretching exercises from the chiropractor that focus specifically on the hip region. It was really helped with the pain and other areas of life. ;-) (My mother would read this a think -- TMI, TMI, TMI!!)
So, note to all: start stretching, don't gain this much weight, and workout regularly, at least three days a week. It does help!
Now, I'm starving and would really like to smell that turkey burger cooking with Penzey's Northwoods spice mix. Delicious!
Apparently, hubby was tired of waiting for me! Food is cooking already!
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Future Post Ideas
This is just a reminder that I plan to write about 'weight pains' next time. Exercise -- obesity -- pain -- chiropractic care -- joints, ligaments, and muscles. UGH!
**these are ideas for future blog posts, just a brainstorming session for me**
**these are ideas for future blog posts, just a brainstorming session for me**
- resume development
- career changes
- professional development
- economy vs economy....
- conversion and journey
- child bearing and starting a family
- community
- in-laws and how to interact
- cards, ideas, new designs
- pysanky
- cats
- pictures
- gardening
Weight and Age
I've always been heavy. Or, at least, since my parents divorced, when I was in third grade. I was a skinny, normal size kid until we moved to Whidbey. I think I began doing the whole emotional eating thing around the time my parents divorced, in 1993. I'll try to post my first, second, and third grade pictures to give you a better idea of what I mean by emotional eating.
I have never been able to kick it. I became involved in high school sports when my mom moved in with her first girlfriend when I transitioned from middle to high school. I played basketball and softball for freshman and sophomore years, then only softball my junior year. I tried out for softball my senior year and knew I wouldn't really make Varsity. I was overweight, slow runner, and my batting wasn't that great. I figured I could serve as an assistant manager or something. However, I was communicating to someone at the state basketball tournament (over-lapped that year with the start of softball season), when I discovered that the new coach, yes, Meche, that's you, had communicated the results of the tryouts to the girls over there before anyone here had been informed one way or the other. My friend was told that I had made neither JV or varsity. I was never informed. At practice the next day, I returned my uniform and told the original coach that I wouldn't be playing this year. I don't know if I ever explained why, but I thought that a veteran teacher would have the sense to not spill the beans to other players until the everyone was informed. Honestly, how unprofessional is that? I'm going to tell some girls who are at the state basketball tournament that their friend did not make either team, even though their friend doesn't even know yet. Really. I had always defended that teacher until she did that. Then I bitched about her as much as everyone else did.
That year I gained about 20 lbs, on top of the 10 or so I gained the previous year from not playing basketball. At the end of basketball season my freshman year, I was 160 lbs, wearing size 12 or 14. By the time I graduated from high school, I was around 200.
Freshman year of college rolled around and... guess what! I gained the freshman 20! Then the sophomore 20... or 30. I was working for the college maintenance department when I decided to give Curves a try. My weigh in? 244 lbs. At 5'2". Body fat percentage? Somewhere around 45%. I was in between sizes at Lane Bryant... 22 fit my legs, but not my stomach. 24 fit my stomach, but not my legs. I didn't want to buy more clothes. At least, not larger ones.
I started working out regularly, three times a week, sometimes four or five. I joined their team of fitness technicians and before long the weight was coming off. 4 lbs, 6 inches, 6 lbs, some more. There was an employee fitness challenge, which I LOVED. I'm competitive. Lazy at times, but generally competitive. I started doing the Curves high protein diet and kept up with it off and on for a few years. I lost weight and got down to 198 lbs (after having the flu, 200 lbs previously). I can do it, I know I can. But, I got married, a little depressed about lack of own classroom. So, I started eating because I was happy, because I was bored, because I was sad, because I was mad. I was eating all the time. I still am.
I got up to 250 lbs. I focused on less food and more exercise for a while and got back down to 225 before I let myself go again. 240. 242. 248. 250. 252. Finally got back to Curves, but started eating more. Not working out consistently. 255. 257. 259. 260. 262. 264. 265. 266.
THAT'S ENOUGH.
I hadn't ever really been depressed about my eating habits before. It was at 252 lbs, I believe, when I first started this blog. But that was the first time guilt about food started to hit me. I also hated my job. From the second week I hated my job. I had never hated a job before. I was miserable. I was upset about some other stuff, too. Fall and winter 2010-11 has been a hard one. I went to the doctor because my period was getting wonky. Guess why? Extra fat cells have extra estrogen which can create an abnormal bleeding cycle. It can also cause poly cystic ovarian syndrome. NOTE: graphic details to come. Skip next paragraph if you don't want the nasty details of my cycle.
I was bleeding between periods. Strong vaginal odor. I would spot dark blood or brownish blood 5-7 days out of my normally non-bleeding time. I was having trouble keeping up with my temperature readings each morning as well. So, so tired. Period is longer, heavier. Big clotty chunks. It really sucked.
Doctor told me that I really, really need to get my eating, exercise, and weight under control. Healthy control. I was doing okay for a while. Some stuff happened again this lent and I responded with craptastic eating habits. 3-6 tablespoons of mayo based dip with dinner. Eating more than 2 cups of food at lunch. Fast food. French fries daily. Eating 1-3 serving sizes of ice cream a night. Take a week to finish a box of girl scout cookies. Walk by the counter, have a bite, or two. Walk by again, have another bite. Walk through the kitchen, have a piece of cheese. Walk past kitchen on the way to bed, have a cookie. Or two. Or four.
BUT IT TASTES SO GOOD! My tummy's happy, right? I've been making the mistake of making my tummy happy to make me happy for so long.. SO LONG. It has to stop. It has to. NOW.
I joined a new gym in March. Their scale said 250 lbs the day after I weighed in at 262 at Curves, so I know their scale is about 12 lbs off. But.... the weight started to come off. I try for 2-4 times a week. Now I'm bouncing around 245 on their scale. I still have a long way to go, but I know I can do it.
I'm thinking of letting hubby cook and prepare his own food for a while, because I am having so much trouble with portion control. I may need to just try the whole TV dinner thing for a while so I can get myself under control.
Current idea:
- I pick breakfast.
- Kid portion-size snack
- Safeway, frozen food section, lean cuisine for lunch
- Kid portion-size snack
- Safeway, frozen food section, lean cuisine for dinner
Just for now. I'm not in a place yet where I can plan out my meals based on carbs, proteins, and fats and calories. But buying a lean meal? I can do that. I need to practice portion size control step-by-step.
So, tomorrow, I am off to Safeway for lunch!
I have never been able to kick it. I became involved in high school sports when my mom moved in with her first girlfriend when I transitioned from middle to high school. I played basketball and softball for freshman and sophomore years, then only softball my junior year. I tried out for softball my senior year and knew I wouldn't really make Varsity. I was overweight, slow runner, and my batting wasn't that great. I figured I could serve as an assistant manager or something. However, I was communicating to someone at the state basketball tournament (over-lapped that year with the start of softball season), when I discovered that the new coach, yes, Meche, that's you, had communicated the results of the tryouts to the girls over there before anyone here had been informed one way or the other. My friend was told that I had made neither JV or varsity. I was never informed. At practice the next day, I returned my uniform and told the original coach that I wouldn't be playing this year. I don't know if I ever explained why, but I thought that a veteran teacher would have the sense to not spill the beans to other players until the everyone was informed. Honestly, how unprofessional is that? I'm going to tell some girls who are at the state basketball tournament that their friend did not make either team, even though their friend doesn't even know yet. Really. I had always defended that teacher until she did that. Then I bitched about her as much as everyone else did.
That year I gained about 20 lbs, on top of the 10 or so I gained the previous year from not playing basketball. At the end of basketball season my freshman year, I was 160 lbs, wearing size 12 or 14. By the time I graduated from high school, I was around 200.
Freshman year of college rolled around and... guess what! I gained the freshman 20! Then the sophomore 20... or 30. I was working for the college maintenance department when I decided to give Curves a try. My weigh in? 244 lbs. At 5'2". Body fat percentage? Somewhere around 45%. I was in between sizes at Lane Bryant... 22 fit my legs, but not my stomach. 24 fit my stomach, but not my legs. I didn't want to buy more clothes. At least, not larger ones.
I started working out regularly, three times a week, sometimes four or five. I joined their team of fitness technicians and before long the weight was coming off. 4 lbs, 6 inches, 6 lbs, some more. There was an employee fitness challenge, which I LOVED. I'm competitive. Lazy at times, but generally competitive. I started doing the Curves high protein diet and kept up with it off and on for a few years. I lost weight and got down to 198 lbs (after having the flu, 200 lbs previously). I can do it, I know I can. But, I got married, a little depressed about lack of own classroom. So, I started eating because I was happy, because I was bored, because I was sad, because I was mad. I was eating all the time. I still am.
I got up to 250 lbs. I focused on less food and more exercise for a while and got back down to 225 before I let myself go again. 240. 242. 248. 250. 252. Finally got back to Curves, but started eating more. Not working out consistently. 255. 257. 259. 260. 262. 264. 265. 266.
THAT'S ENOUGH.
I hadn't ever really been depressed about my eating habits before. It was at 252 lbs, I believe, when I first started this blog. But that was the first time guilt about food started to hit me. I also hated my job. From the second week I hated my job. I had never hated a job before. I was miserable. I was upset about some other stuff, too. Fall and winter 2010-11 has been a hard one. I went to the doctor because my period was getting wonky. Guess why? Extra fat cells have extra estrogen which can create an abnormal bleeding cycle. It can also cause poly cystic ovarian syndrome. NOTE: graphic details to come. Skip next paragraph if you don't want the nasty details of my cycle.
I was bleeding between periods. Strong vaginal odor. I would spot dark blood or brownish blood 5-7 days out of my normally non-bleeding time. I was having trouble keeping up with my temperature readings each morning as well. So, so tired. Period is longer, heavier. Big clotty chunks. It really sucked.
Doctor told me that I really, really need to get my eating, exercise, and weight under control. Healthy control. I was doing okay for a while. Some stuff happened again this lent and I responded with craptastic eating habits. 3-6 tablespoons of mayo based dip with dinner. Eating more than 2 cups of food at lunch. Fast food. French fries daily. Eating 1-3 serving sizes of ice cream a night. Take a week to finish a box of girl scout cookies. Walk by the counter, have a bite, or two. Walk by again, have another bite. Walk through the kitchen, have a piece of cheese. Walk past kitchen on the way to bed, have a cookie. Or two. Or four.
BUT IT TASTES SO GOOD! My tummy's happy, right? I've been making the mistake of making my tummy happy to make me happy for so long.. SO LONG. It has to stop. It has to. NOW.
I joined a new gym in March. Their scale said 250 lbs the day after I weighed in at 262 at Curves, so I know their scale is about 12 lbs off. But.... the weight started to come off. I try for 2-4 times a week. Now I'm bouncing around 245 on their scale. I still have a long way to go, but I know I can do it.
I'm thinking of letting hubby cook and prepare his own food for a while, because I am having so much trouble with portion control. I may need to just try the whole TV dinner thing for a while so I can get myself under control.
Current idea:
- I pick breakfast.
- Kid portion-size snack
- Safeway, frozen food section, lean cuisine for lunch
- Kid portion-size snack
- Safeway, frozen food section, lean cuisine for dinner
Just for now. I'm not in a place yet where I can plan out my meals based on carbs, proteins, and fats and calories. But buying a lean meal? I can do that. I need to practice portion size control step-by-step.
So, tomorrow, I am off to Safeway for lunch!
Changes
I originally started this blog to track my diet and exercise progress and to gripe about how much physical appearance effects my job prospects. Well, I did get a job -- with a corporation of preschool/daycare centers teaching kindergarten.
Well, a number of things have happened and I want to touch on these over the next few blog posts. First, of course, my body is changing! Age and weight combined have created some interesting changes. Second, my career may be changing. Third, shit happens. This will probably be a frequent point of discussion. Stuff happens and, well, I just need to get it out on occasion!
My experience with journaling, of course, has been intermittent at best. We'll see how this goes.
Well, a number of things have happened and I want to touch on these over the next few blog posts. First, of course, my body is changing! Age and weight combined have created some interesting changes. Second, my career may be changing. Third, shit happens. This will probably be a frequent point of discussion. Stuff happens and, well, I just need to get it out on occasion!
My experience with journaling, of course, has been intermittent at best. We'll see how this goes.
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